thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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