Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Randomize