When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
