Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Randomize
