Can Purell be used as lube?
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
