Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
