Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
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