2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
