**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
