OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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