i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
