Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
