I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize