I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Randomize
