it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
