he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
