if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
