i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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