woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
