I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize