hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize