you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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