You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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