She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I will pee on everything he values.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Randomize