Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
You made out with two different species that night
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
