: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
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