You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Randomize
