I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
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