You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
