Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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