I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
