He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
