you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize