Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
why does every cop we meet know your name?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
