So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize