we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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