The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Randomize