Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
