giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize