Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
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