i just google imaged poop.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
