we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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