I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
