Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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