I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Found your dick twin last night
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
