This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
