Do vagina's smell?
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
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