I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Randomize