Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
