bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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