I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
