Sry I called you an 8
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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